Ever question your ability of being a good mother? Don’t worry. You are not by yourself. It is common for us as moms to be their own worst critic. The saying, “We are our own worst critic” should actually be, “Moms are their own worst critic”. Just yesterday I criticized myself about being a good mother. My son approached me to announce that he did not win the 1st place in the fundraiser and seemed sad about it. After informing me of the number of items sold by the winner, I immediately began to feel guilt. If only I worked harder at getting people to donate my son would have won. The thoughts in my head must have transferred to my face. The look in my son’s eyes made me come to senses quickly. I realized that the measure of success was not winning this competition; it was about making it a fun experience for my son. I focused it on the wrong thing. The measure of success was showing that no matter the outcome, we should always be happy for other people. Next time, I know that I will make the next fundraiser he is given, a fun experience. When I began to express my happiness to my son and comfort that he did an awesome job, his response was rewarding. The guilty mom syndrome went away quickly because I applied three simple steps. It actually works! We are going to have moments where we are going to feel guilty or feel unaccomplished as a mom. But what we must remember these three simple steps and know that we are AWESOME and CAPABLE.
Step 1: Acknowledge that you are human.
Motherhood is a complex job, your list can grow long and you will often get to accomplish everything that you desired to do in a day. But you must remember that you are human. It is not about how much you are getting done, it is about doing the best you can. If that involves leaving things off the list, then that is OK. Don’t criticize yourself about not being perfect, life is not about that. You were blessed with your children for a reason. And it was not because you are perfect, it was because you are best for the job of raising your children.
Step 2: You are in your race.
Comparison Syndrome is an ugly condition. Everyone does it. The ones who survive this condition are the ones who focus on defining who they are themselves. Things that other moms have are for them. You have your own set of awesomeness that no other mother has. When you compare yourself to other moms, you are giving yourself a disservice. It’s time to be in your own race. Be happy for what others have accomplished, but know that you are also blessed.
Step 3: Focus on enjoying the moment.
It’s time to get out of your head and into the moment. Criticizing yourself only robs you of living the life you are meant to live. Focus on enjoying the moment.
Moms, It’s time to enjoy the moment! You deserve it. Purchase my “Enjoy The Moment” shirts made for moms as a reminder that we are all awesome and unique in this world. Enjoying the moment allows us to live!