Is there a dangerous side to being a mother? Sure, motherhood is nothing short of a blessing. But there are plenty of moments where you feel you are going to burst, as if you are in a whirlwind of emotions that make you just want to simply escape! You see, when I had my first son, I was a ball of emotions (I still am…but not as much! LOL!). I constantly questioned myself on whether or not I was doing the right thing for my child. And it seems like everyone, and I mean EVERYONE wanted to share their two cents, opinions and criticisms about what I did with my son. Is this what motherhood is supposed to feel like? I remember feeling so stressed out thinking about what other people would say, scared to do something different with my son, wondering why there were more people who were critical than those who expressed genuine support. That feeling is something that made me sick with worry. Sure, there were stresses that were related to raising a child, but the stress of my interactions with critics played a stress that done more harm than good. It seems that people have become so comfortable in being Dr. Phil that they are desensitized in gauging how you may feel if they were to say something opinionated.
If you feel overwhelmed due to the comments of others and are unsure in what to do, I would like to provide you with some tips to stay out of the danger zone:
1. Stay away from nagging critics.
You are probably asking, how can I do that when it consist mostly of people close to me? Yes, I went there. Typically a mother’s worst critic can consist of her family, her friends, and mostly not mentioned….herself. It’s time to take a step back, you do not have to be around people who criticize everything you do in raising your children. If you feel uncomfortable, simply limit your interactions with them.
2. Learn to “tune out” and gain focus.
If you haven’t reached the talent of tuning people, tantrums, and critics out, believe me when I say that it will come in your journey of motherhood! Stay mentally strong in your decisions that you make for your family, and know that only you know what will be best for your household. Write on a 1″x1″ piece of paper the people whose opinion that matters, if they are not on the list, remind yourself that what they say should not have an effect on you.
3. Say it loud! I’m stressed and not proud.
Vent, scream, throw a pillow or even exercise. It is important for you to release thoughts or feelings that can cause harm to your mental well-being. You have value in the world and are too important to bottle yourself up over others opinion.
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